John Dies at the End is the most horrifying, paranoia-inducing, soul-searing novel I have ever read. It's also pretty hilarious. Author David Wong manages to juggle stomach-churning terror and crude jokes without diluting either, so it never becomes a comedic novel about the supernatural nor a horror novel with comic relief (if you can follow that).
The concept of the novel is rather difficult to explain. That is, it's easy to give a general description of what happens, but when you just say it, it sounds kinda stupid. (I'm sure David Wong would agree with me on this one- he's refered to this book as "my retarded horror story.") You just don't get the same sense of latent horror by describing the situation as you do by reading it. None the less, I'll try. The basic plot is this: two slackers, Dave and the titular John, are at a party when John takes a new drug called Soy Sauce that allows normal humans to percieve and interact with the supernatural. Not the fun kind of supernatural, where all the wizards and vampires and werewolves act just like humans but with superpowers such as Harry Potter, Twilight, and so on. I'm talking about the H. P. Lovecraft kind of supernatural, where you find more and more evidence showing that the normal world is a fragile and broken delusion, where eldritch horrors, corruption, and the fear of the night reign supreme. I apologize for the melodrama of the last sentence, but something about this genre draws out the drama queen in me. After John takes the Soy Sauce and Dave is involuntarily exposed to it as well, they are drawn unwillingly into a fight against an other dimensional invasion by a elder god(ish) called Korrok, who has the sense of humor of an unsophisticated 13 year old boy.
Also, in between fighting various meat monsters, shadow men, resurrected neonazis, there's lots and lots of jokes. And there all crude, and about 98% of them are hilarious.
Unfortunately, no one can be told what John Dies at the End is. You have to see it for yourself.
Selected quotes:
" 'How does somebody get into this?' [she asked.]
'There was an incident,' [John] said. 'A series of incidents, I guess. A dead guy, another dead guy. Some drugs. It's kind of a long story. Now we can see things. Sometimes. I have a dead cat that follows me around, wondering why I never feed it. Oh, and I had one hamburger that started mooing when I ate.' He glanced at me. 'You remember that?'
I grunted, said nothing...
'I call it Dante's Syndrome,' John said. I had never heard him call it any such thing. "Meaning, I think Dave and I gained the ability to look into Hell. Only it turns out Hell is right here, it's all through us and around us and in us like the microbes the swarm through your lungs and guts and veins. Hey, look! An owl!'
We all looked. It was an owl, alright."
"Now, I wasn't there, so this story is hearsay. If you know John, you'll take the details for what they're worth. Please also remember that, where John claims to have 'gotten up at three thirty' to perform this investigation, it was far more likely he was still up and somewhat drunk from the night before."
Dave, talking to a reporter:
" 'Do you ever go to the bathroom late at night, Arnie, and for a second, just a split second, you glimpse something in the mirror other than your reflection? Then you turn the light on and, of course, everything's fine again. But for just half a second, maybe while you were leaving the room, you see out of the corner of your eye that isn't you in the mirror. Or maybe it is you, only changed? And what's looking back at you is something completely different? Something not very human?'
'Let's go back inside, okay? Your story was more interesting.'
'You're going to die, Arnie. Someday, you will face that moment. Regardless of what you believe, at that moment you will either face complete nonexistence, which is something you can't possibly imagine, or you will face something even stranger that you also can't possibly imagine. On an actual day in the future, you will be in the unimaginable, Arnie. Set your mind on that.'
Silence, for a few seconds. Arnie nodded a little.
'Okay.'
'Now, without turning your head, look at the box.'
Arnie did, recoiled, stumbled and finally fell on his ass.
'Oh, [shoot]!' he gasped. '[Shoot]!! What was the [shoot] is that?' "
(Seeing as this is a churchish blog, I edited the last for language. It hits harder with the profanity.)
I hope I managed to give you a feel for the book. Very few books can claim to have scare me, but this one most definitely succeeds. If you find any artistic value in genuine horror, and have any affection for the cruder side of humor, then this book is tailor made for you.
Wednesday, July 7, 2010
Thursday, June 24, 2010
Eric's Blog About Books- Issue #2- Ivanhoe
Ivanhoe is a historical fiction novel by Sir Walter Scott, first published in 1819, and it is freakin' awesome. The plot is relatively straight forward- noble knight loves woman, hacks up a ton of bad guys to rescue her, and is generally a force for good and justice in a troubled land. And there's also a few subplots about a family of Jews getting screwed over constantly, and also about Robin Hood. Incidentally, all stories that connect the Legend of Robin Hood to Richard the Lionheart's return come directly to this book. That includes every movie every made about Robin Hood, including the Disney version. You may thank Sir Walter I'm-a-Kickass-Novelist Scott for all of them.
Ivanhoe takes place in 12th century England, where Norman overlords oppress and insult their Saxon peasants constantly. The divide between the crude yet noble Saxon underdogs and the the refined but despicable Normans drives most of the plot. (Also, this is one of the few historical novels where one could believably portray the English as a people oppressed by another group. See also Ireland, English Presence in, and India, Colonization of.) Ivanhoe, a young Saxon knight, pisses off his ultranationalist father Cedric by spending time in King Richard's court and learning Norman ways, and then pisses him off further by falling in love with his adopted sister, Rowena. They're not related by blood, so it's no problem to us or them, but Cedric plans to marry her off to a fellow Saxon warlord to create an alliance to throw off the Norman yoke. Cedric exiles his own son, who then goes off to the Crusades with Richard the Lionheart. Years later, he returns without arms, armour, a horse or any friends, determined to win Rowena and be restored to his father. Thus the plot begins.
I won't go into the plot here too much, because I want you to read the book, or watch one of the movie versions. But I will say, there's dastardly Templars, evil knights who get righteously shanked, jousting, torture, trial by combat for an innocent woman's life, and a much, much more. You've probably seen all the plot devices before, any time someone references knights or the Middle Ages, but never knew that many of the tropes were popularized by this book. It is a bloody great adventure, and as someone who grew up on Hollywood action flicks, that should tell you something.
It is somewhat hard to get into for the first couple of pages, because writing styles from the early 19th century are somewhat more, ah, opaque than what we in the early 21st century are used to. For instance, in the beginning Scott spends almost two whole pages describing in mind-numbing detail the exact clothes worn by two minor characters. I mean, gah. But once you break through the intial writing style, believe me, it's mustard.
Just one last note. One of the subplots, as I mentioned earlier, is of a Jewish moneylender named Isaac and his daughter Rebecca, and the various ways everyone hates them and can harm them with impunity. In fact, even the Ivanhoe, the Knight in Shining Armor, just after he saves Isaac from robbery and possible death, says this little gem:
" 'Our road,' said [Ivanhoe], 'should here seperate; for it beseems not men of my character and thine to travel together longer than needs be..."
And that's the good guy. Sort of a minor theme throughout the book is just how vulnerable Jews are to the predatations of Christians. One vivid example- Prince John and Cedric the Saxon are sitting in the top booth, about to watch the tourney. Prince John sees Isaac in the crowd below, and, thinking to mock Cedric, commands Isaac to take Cedric's place. Isaac naturally doesn't want to cause a scene that would put him in the spotlight, tries to beg off, but Prince John insists, because Prince John is a douche. Cedric looks like he's about to toss Isaac off the balcony.
Prince John says, "Let me see who dares stop him!"
Well, Cedric certainly looks like he dares. Isaac is screwed; if he goes up to take Cedric's place, he gets curb-stomped and possibly stabbed, as Cedric's temper is legendary, but if he refuses John's command, he gets horse whipped and robbed.
Isaac is saved by the timely intervention of the Court Jester, who jumps out at him and thrusts a chunk of pork in Isaac's face while brandishing a wooden sword at him, which startles Isaac so much he loses his footing and falls down the stairs. This amuses John so much he lets the whole thing drop. I really like the Jester, who later on joins up with Richard and cracks some jokes worthy of a Shakespearian comedy, so I choose to interpret that scene as him successfully saving Isaac and defusing a volatile situation, but, damn. When being humiliated, insulted, and slipping down the stairs is literally the best case scenario, you know you're in bad times.
To his credit, Sir Walter Scott does not portray this horrific antisemitism as being in any way good. Rebecca gets a fairly substantial subplot of her own later on, and all Jews present are shown sympathectically. Not to mention all the clearly bad guys specifically target the Jews.
Considering that antisemitism is still alive today, and was possibly even stronger in 1819 England, I'd say Scott is to be congratulated on his skillful weaving of the troubles that Jews faced into his romantic adventure.
Ivanhoe takes place in 12th century England, where Norman overlords oppress and insult their Saxon peasants constantly. The divide between the crude yet noble Saxon underdogs and the the refined but despicable Normans drives most of the plot. (Also, this is one of the few historical novels where one could believably portray the English as a people oppressed by another group. See also Ireland, English Presence in, and India, Colonization of.) Ivanhoe, a young Saxon knight, pisses off his ultranationalist father Cedric by spending time in King Richard's court and learning Norman ways, and then pisses him off further by falling in love with his adopted sister, Rowena. They're not related by blood, so it's no problem to us or them, but Cedric plans to marry her off to a fellow Saxon warlord to create an alliance to throw off the Norman yoke. Cedric exiles his own son, who then goes off to the Crusades with Richard the Lionheart. Years later, he returns without arms, armour, a horse or any friends, determined to win Rowena and be restored to his father. Thus the plot begins.
I won't go into the plot here too much, because I want you to read the book, or watch one of the movie versions. But I will say, there's dastardly Templars, evil knights who get righteously shanked, jousting, torture, trial by combat for an innocent woman's life, and a much, much more. You've probably seen all the plot devices before, any time someone references knights or the Middle Ages, but never knew that many of the tropes were popularized by this book. It is a bloody great adventure, and as someone who grew up on Hollywood action flicks, that should tell you something.
It is somewhat hard to get into for the first couple of pages, because writing styles from the early 19th century are somewhat more, ah, opaque than what we in the early 21st century are used to. For instance, in the beginning Scott spends almost two whole pages describing in mind-numbing detail the exact clothes worn by two minor characters. I mean, gah. But once you break through the intial writing style, believe me, it's mustard.
Just one last note. One of the subplots, as I mentioned earlier, is of a Jewish moneylender named Isaac and his daughter Rebecca, and the various ways everyone hates them and can harm them with impunity. In fact, even the Ivanhoe, the Knight in Shining Armor, just after he saves Isaac from robbery and possible death, says this little gem:
" 'Our road,' said [Ivanhoe], 'should here seperate; for it beseems not men of my character and thine to travel together longer than needs be..."
And that's the good guy. Sort of a minor theme throughout the book is just how vulnerable Jews are to the predatations of Christians. One vivid example- Prince John and Cedric the Saxon are sitting in the top booth, about to watch the tourney. Prince John sees Isaac in the crowd below, and, thinking to mock Cedric, commands Isaac to take Cedric's place. Isaac naturally doesn't want to cause a scene that would put him in the spotlight, tries to beg off, but Prince John insists, because Prince John is a douche. Cedric looks like he's about to toss Isaac off the balcony.
Prince John says, "Let me see who dares stop him!"
Well, Cedric certainly looks like he dares. Isaac is screwed; if he goes up to take Cedric's place, he gets curb-stomped and possibly stabbed, as Cedric's temper is legendary, but if he refuses John's command, he gets horse whipped and robbed.
Isaac is saved by the timely intervention of the Court Jester, who jumps out at him and thrusts a chunk of pork in Isaac's face while brandishing a wooden sword at him, which startles Isaac so much he loses his footing and falls down the stairs. This amuses John so much he lets the whole thing drop. I really like the Jester, who later on joins up with Richard and cracks some jokes worthy of a Shakespearian comedy, so I choose to interpret that scene as him successfully saving Isaac and defusing a volatile situation, but, damn. When being humiliated, insulted, and slipping down the stairs is literally the best case scenario, you know you're in bad times.
To his credit, Sir Walter Scott does not portray this horrific antisemitism as being in any way good. Rebecca gets a fairly substantial subplot of her own later on, and all Jews present are shown sympathectically. Not to mention all the clearly bad guys specifically target the Jews.
Considering that antisemitism is still alive today, and was possibly even stronger in 1819 England, I'd say Scott is to be congratulated on his skillful weaving of the troubles that Jews faced into his romantic adventure.
Wednesday, June 23, 2010
Reminder: Bible Study Location
Bible Study this Thursday is at Susan Flaming's House. 2114 N Greenbrier Rd. We start at 6:30pm sharp. Bring your Bibles and join us as we study Revelation 1!
Wednesday, June 16, 2010
Eric's Blog About Books- Issue #1- The Black Company
I have decided to start up a sort of miniblog here about the hundreds upon thousands of stories I have read and loved. I firmly belive that God created us to tell stories to each other, and I am conveniently capable of sharing about books.
This first post is about Glen Cook's The Black Company.
Here is a handy little summary, via wikipedia: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Black_Company_(novel)
The best way to state the premise of The Black Company is to imagine a version of Lord of the Rings from the point of view of a minor soldier of Sauron's army. It is deliberately void of the cliches of the fantasy genre- no elves or dwarves, no clear line between bad guys and good guys, no stalwart hero determined to do right. There are a few stock conventions present, but they all seem to be slightly off- the Evil Empire is actually of benefit to the lower classes, the Wicked Sorcerors come across as oddly human (even while raining thaumaturgic death upon their enemies), the Noble Resistance is just as heartless, cruel and psychotic as the Empire they're fighting. The whole thing plays like what it would look like if your standard fantasy novel was mere propoganda from the side that won.
The plot goes something like this: The Black Company is a mercenary oufit in a quasi-medieval world. They fight for pay and are generally the best, sneakiest, most professional soldiers around. They suscribe firmly to the belief that moral absolutism is a myth, that ultimate good depends on where you stand. They get hired by the aforementioned Evil Empire, headed by an extremely powerful Sorceress known as the Lady, who commands the Ten Who Were Taken, or just the Taken (it helps to think of it as the Lady= Sauron, the Taken= Ringwraiths). While serving against the Rebels, they hear of a prophecy that a messianic figure called the White Rose will be reincarnated and bring down the Lady. Being cynical, world weary soldiers, they don't believe it... until one of their members believes he's found her.
It's a great plot, filled with intrigue, plots within plots, sly humor, and wonderous imagination. But the plot is not what makes me love this series. There is also the distinct and highly realistic characters.
Croaker, the narrator, is the Annalist (a.k.a. historian) and physician of the Black Company. The book's framing device is Croaker writing the current events down as company history. The later books have fun with this device by having later annalists read Croaker's accounts and wonder how much of it was actually accurate and unbiased. Croaker is a closet romantic, in love with history and a complete believer in following Company traditions. He is also a highly trained and usually effective doctor, hence the nickname.
One-Eye and Goblin are two diminuative minor wizards who serve with the Company. They are mischevious, malicious, puckish, and engaged in a century long feud. They appear to hate each other but couldn't live without each other.
Soulcatcher is one of the Taken, and the Company's patron. He is your standard evil sorceror, filled with doom and gloom and unholy power, except he's a pretty reasonable guy who does right for those under him. He has a habit of switching voices every sentence, and it's implied that all the voices are actually him using the souls of the people he's killed. He's also a narcissistic megalomaniac without much long term focus.
Raven is a mysterious man with a mysterious past and mysterious motivations. A badass, cold and hard, doesn't give a crap about anything. He could and does piss off one of the Taken and doesn't even bat an eye. Or so he likes to show people. He's later revealed to be an emotional cripple whose only skill is with a blade, and he is not shown in a positive light at all.
Darling is a deafmute orphan that Raven and the rest of the Company adopt. The fact that the Black Company rescued her is just about the only reason we have to think of them as the good guys.
And there are a hundred more characters in the first book alone. Glen Cook appears to have a gift for making characters come to life.
One final note on the series; Glen Cook has a fascinating technique of zooming up close to minor details of his characters' lives and then zooming out to the world view. For example, Croaker writes about how the Company is ordered to take a critically placed fortress from the Rebels, and then hold it throughout the winter. He mentions in about a paragraph that they succeeded with few casualties. He then spends the next five pages describing a card game the soldiers are playing, and them wondering who's turn it is to go out in the cold and get supplies from the town.
The Black Company is almost a deconstruction of the fantasy genre, in that it asks, "What would the world look like if things like black magic and evil overlords and Tolkienesque worlds and so on actually existed? How would people respond?"
Till next time.
This first post is about Glen Cook's The Black Company.
Here is a handy little summary, via wikipedia: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Black_Company_(novel)
The best way to state the premise of The Black Company is to imagine a version of Lord of the Rings from the point of view of a minor soldier of Sauron's army. It is deliberately void of the cliches of the fantasy genre- no elves or dwarves, no clear line between bad guys and good guys, no stalwart hero determined to do right. There are a few stock conventions present, but they all seem to be slightly off- the Evil Empire is actually of benefit to the lower classes, the Wicked Sorcerors come across as oddly human (even while raining thaumaturgic death upon their enemies), the Noble Resistance is just as heartless, cruel and psychotic as the Empire they're fighting. The whole thing plays like what it would look like if your standard fantasy novel was mere propoganda from the side that won.
The plot goes something like this: The Black Company is a mercenary oufit in a quasi-medieval world. They fight for pay and are generally the best, sneakiest, most professional soldiers around. They suscribe firmly to the belief that moral absolutism is a myth, that ultimate good depends on where you stand. They get hired by the aforementioned Evil Empire, headed by an extremely powerful Sorceress known as the Lady, who commands the Ten Who Were Taken, or just the Taken (it helps to think of it as the Lady= Sauron, the Taken= Ringwraiths). While serving against the Rebels, they hear of a prophecy that a messianic figure called the White Rose will be reincarnated and bring down the Lady. Being cynical, world weary soldiers, they don't believe it... until one of their members believes he's found her.
It's a great plot, filled with intrigue, plots within plots, sly humor, and wonderous imagination. But the plot is not what makes me love this series. There is also the distinct and highly realistic characters.
Croaker, the narrator, is the Annalist (a.k.a. historian) and physician of the Black Company. The book's framing device is Croaker writing the current events down as company history. The later books have fun with this device by having later annalists read Croaker's accounts and wonder how much of it was actually accurate and unbiased. Croaker is a closet romantic, in love with history and a complete believer in following Company traditions. He is also a highly trained and usually effective doctor, hence the nickname.
One-Eye and Goblin are two diminuative minor wizards who serve with the Company. They are mischevious, malicious, puckish, and engaged in a century long feud. They appear to hate each other but couldn't live without each other.
Soulcatcher is one of the Taken, and the Company's patron. He is your standard evil sorceror, filled with doom and gloom and unholy power, except he's a pretty reasonable guy who does right for those under him. He has a habit of switching voices every sentence, and it's implied that all the voices are actually him using the souls of the people he's killed. He's also a narcissistic megalomaniac without much long term focus.
Raven is a mysterious man with a mysterious past and mysterious motivations. A badass, cold and hard, doesn't give a crap about anything. He could and does piss off one of the Taken and doesn't even bat an eye. Or so he likes to show people. He's later revealed to be an emotional cripple whose only skill is with a blade, and he is not shown in a positive light at all.
Darling is a deafmute orphan that Raven and the rest of the Company adopt. The fact that the Black Company rescued her is just about the only reason we have to think of them as the good guys.
And there are a hundred more characters in the first book alone. Glen Cook appears to have a gift for making characters come to life.
One final note on the series; Glen Cook has a fascinating technique of zooming up close to minor details of his characters' lives and then zooming out to the world view. For example, Croaker writes about how the Company is ordered to take a critically placed fortress from the Rebels, and then hold it throughout the winter. He mentions in about a paragraph that they succeeded with few casualties. He then spends the next five pages describing a card game the soldiers are playing, and them wondering who's turn it is to go out in the cold and get supplies from the town.
The Black Company is almost a deconstruction of the fantasy genre, in that it asks, "What would the world look like if things like black magic and evil overlords and Tolkienesque worlds and so on actually existed? How would people respond?"
Till next time.
Monday, June 7, 2010
On a Monday???
WOW! So today I finally did it! Well The Dude (Ryan Albright) and I served at Lydia House today! It was really cool, different, tiring, and it seemed calmer than usual!
Really Cool because everyone was shocked to see us! The kids came Running at us, probably because the were tired of sitting in there with the adults listening to the lesson! LOL!!!
Different because IT WAS A MONDAY! Everyone was asking, What are you doing here on a monday?
Tiring because it was just The Dude and I with around 11 or 12! Wowzers!
& Calmer because there weren't a lot of us (even though It would have been really cool if more of us). Actually we were served food today! I was blessed to be the women's presents today!
A woman prayed today and it touched me so! It showed that a lot of these women really just loved the unconditional love of God!
Thank You God!
Thursday, June 3, 2010
Camping!!!
So here's the deal. We are going camping June 25th-27th, up in the beautiful Kings Canyon, about 30 miles past Hume Lake.
We're leaving bright and early, at 7am on Friday, June 25th.
Cost: Not sure yet...but not more than $20.
More info to follow...but put the date on your calendar.
Wednesday, June 2, 2010
Where do I go during Sunday's Second Hour?
Since the college community is not meeting Sunday mornings this summer, many of you are wondering what in the world you should do instead. Here are some suggestions.
#1 Go to church. Some of you have gotten into the bad habit of sleeping in, missing church, and then going to college group. Less than stellar idea. Go to church!
#2 Visit another ABF. Since the college community is age-specific and temporary, view this as a great opportunity to visit another ABF and meet other people at Grace. The Gathering (Room 202), Open Source (Room 206), and Global Engagement (Room 200) would all be great places to visit and get connected to other people at Grace. They don't bite. If they do, let me know and I'll teach you self-defense skills.
#3 Go to lunch. View this summer as a time to take initiative in creating good habits of friendship. Grab a few others and head over to Baja Sonora and discuss the sermon. The key here is that someone, at some point, needs to take initiative and lead out. Be creative!
#4 Wander aimlessly in your own misery. You could spend the time feeling awkward, pacing the hallways, spending extra time in the bathroom. This is a legitimate option. And one that many of you prefer. Sorry, I couldn't help it!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)